


A Solitary Aburame

by Valkyriav



Category: Naruto
Genre: Bullying, Character Study, F/M, Friendship, Friendship-Starved, Gen, Loneliness, Shino Week 2021, Shino has a crush, Touch-Starved, self indulgent shinohina
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:34:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28816419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valkyriav/pseuds/Valkyriav
Summary: The life of every Aburame tends to be one of solitude. Shino was no different… until his team came along.Day 1 of Shino Week 2021: Solitude
Relationships: Aburame Shino & Akamaru, Aburame Shino & Hyuuga Hinata & Inuzuka Kiba, Aburame Shino & Inuzuka Kiba, Aburame Shino & Yuuhi Kurenai, Aburame Shino/Hyuuga Hinata
Comments: 8
Kudos: 24
Collections: Written stories for Shino Week 2021





	A Solitary Aburame

Shino still remembered the bullies in the Academy. It didn’t help that he was the only Aburame his age. His classmates were naturally curious about the boy cloaked in a heavy coat, with eyes always hidden behind a pair of shades. The children asked all sorts of overwhelming questions about his body - each which he tried to answer as truthfully as he could - but they were never satisfied. 

“You’re lying,” they would say. “Prove it,” they would giggle, daring him to show them his eyes, his skin.

Embarrassment would prickle at his cheeks when he refused. He wasn’t supposed to. And he didn’t even want to. 

One boy had even tried to steal his shades off his face. Shino was bigger than the other kids his age so he was able to easily shove the boy off him. Shino was glad he didn’t have to use his beetles - he didn’t quite have the control or restraint yet to command his hive to not kill a threat. Thankfully Shino kept his height advantage as he grew, and he did not suffer any threat meekly; he always stood his ground and stared any would-be bullies down unflinchingly. Shino never bothered confronting anyone over words, so the bullies stuck to insults and teasing rather than try anything physical again. They made fun of him for his clothes and the way he went out of his way to stop people from killing bugs. They called him dirty, grossed out by his beetles that he allowed to crawl out of his coat onto his desk when he wanted to play with them. 

While Shino remained stoic and quiet in the face of these insults, it secretly crushed him. His classmates thought him weird and creepy and avoided him. They inched away from him when he tried to talk to them about an interesting bug fact he had recently learned. Shino eventually found it easier to just keep to himself. It was less troublesome that way, even when all he wanted was a friend, just one to replace the hole that Torune left. 

Shino’s first crush was a pretty girl with brown hair and blue eyes. He had been brave and gave her a flower. She giggled and thanked him, but then gave him a side-eyed look with an odd smile he couldn’t place. The next day at the Academy she was giggling amongst her friends and pointing at him between their whispers. The boys caught wind of his crush soon after. 

“Didn’t you know?” one of the boys would say loudly, “Aburames eat the heads off their crushes. Just like cockroaches do.” 

And the girls would squeal, letting out exaggerated, long “ew’s” and then giggle hysterically.

The most frustrating part was how _wrong_ the boy was. It was the _praying mantis_ that ate the head off their mate. But also, Aburames absolutely did _not_ eat the heads off their partners. (And even if he _was_ a praying mantis, it was the _female_ that ate the head off its mate. Not the male.) 

But by then Shino had learned that trying to correct them was pointless, so he would just sit silently at his desk and sink his face deeper into the collar of his coat, thankful that he had this protective barrier between him and the outside world. 

The laughter would finally stop as soon as Iruka walked back in and shushed them all.

Shino’s second crush was Hinata. It started after he observed her admiring an iridescent beetle. He couldn’t help himself and spouted out facts about it to her. She smiled at him and stuttered out a kind thank you. 

Hinata had been the only girl that didn’t look at him strangely or giggle with the others when someone said something rude about him. She was quiet like him and liked to spend time alone at recess. Shino felt a certain kind of camaraderie with her and just liked to admire her from afar. They rarely spoke - only really when they had to or were paired for team exercises (which was often considering they often ended up as the odd ones out when Iruka told the class to partner up). He decided early on that he would not trouble her with his feelings; she clearly already had eyes for Naruto. No one else noticed it, but he did. 

When his father asked him if he had made any new friends, Shino said yes. “Human friends?” Shibi then specified. Shino said yes to that too, and Shibi hummed in approval. 

It was the truth. Kind of. At least, Shino liked to pretend it was true. He had lunch friends. 

The social outcasts sat quietly near each other at lunch as they ate. It was kind of an alliance of sorts - they provided each other company to both prevent being singled out by bullies or looking like friendless losers. At the same time they still sat a respectable distance apart to give each other space, none of them quite brave enough to reach out for a new friend. Shino sat with Choji, Sakura, and Hinata. Choji was there because he was teased for his weight. Sakura was teased for her forehead. Hinata’s shyness and stutter made it difficult for her to make any friends. Naruto had tried to sit with them too for a bit, but he quickly got bored with how quiet they all were. However, their little lunch group shrunk with time as everyone found their place - Ino poached Sakura and Shikamaru poached Choji. That left Shino and Hinata alone together. Shino didn’t mind that. Even though they never spoke, he sometimes wondered if Hinata thought of him as a friend too. They had even developed an unspoken rule - neither of them would leave for recess until the other had finished their lunch, so neither of them would ever be stuck eating lunch all alone. 

Still, he wished he had his own Ino or Shikamaru to whisk him away and show the other kids that he wasn’t all that weird and creepy, and that he could be a good friend to them too. He used to have Torune - but Torune was now long gone. Shino told himself he could manage just fine alone, but when he watched the other children laugh and play together at recess, he felt lonely. He often wondered what it was like to be touched and hugged by someone you could call a friend. He had forgotten the feeling. He would sometimes secretly glance at Hinata and wish they could have that, but he didn’t know how, and if she would even want it too.

One time Shino had accidentally touched Hinata’s hand. Hinata had forgotten her lunch and Shino had offered to share his own. When he passed her his bento box, their fingers brushed briefly. A strange spark shot up his arm, a fuzzy warmth spread through his chest, and he felt his face go red hot. Hinata profusely apologized, as though she might have somehow offended him, when all Shino wanted was for their hands to touch again. Was that pleasant feeling what it was like to touch a friend? Or a crush? Shino sometimes liked to lay in bed and stare at his hand, reimagining the feeling. 

When their class finally started sparring each other more seriously, Shino had made his reputation worse by adding ‘menacing’ and ‘dangerous’ to his list of labels that already contained ‘creepy’ and ‘weird’. At recess Shino was minding his business among the trees, collecting cicada husks, when three boys approached him. They were all ones he was very familiar with - they enjoyed bullying him the most. The leader tried to goad Shino into a fight, feeling overconfident after winning all of his spars that day. When Shino didn’t take the bait, the leader squashed an innocent spider crawling its way up a tree, and threatened to kill more if Shino didn’t comply. 

“Very well,” Shino answered as his beetles swarmed out of his sleeves.

The fight was no contest, even when the other two boys tried to team up against him too. Nothing in their Academy training could prepare them for an Aburame’s beetle swarm. The Academy only honed the basics; it was simply too difficult to train every clan’s unique jutsus - unique clan jutsus were expected to be practiced at home. Shino found his father to be correct that the Aburame’s unique jutsu also had an offensive psychological component with the way the boys screamed in terror when they could do nothing as the beetles swarmed all over them. 

The sound quickly attracted the attention of their other classmates who came to watch the fight, and then soon Iruka came running to put a stop to all of it. Shino complied and called back all his beetles. The boys immediately lied to Iruka - crying that Shino had attacked them for no reason. Shino tried to state his case but Iruka wasn’t quite sure who to believe and punished them all with detention and a talk with their parents. When Shino explained himself to his father, Shibi sighed and told Shino he wasn’t mad, but that Shino had to be more careful because of how easy an Aburame’s reputation could be tarnished from the stigma they carried. 

Shibi was right. After that incident all of the bullying stopped, and his classmates regarded him with caution and fear rather than just disgust or mockery. Shino was now dangerous and not one to be crossed. They left him alone even more than before, which suited him just fine. At least, that’s what he told himself. 

But the day after the fight Hinata had meekly approached him and stuttered out an “I believe you.” Before he could even reply she ran away, face beet red. Hinata even still decided to sit with him at lunch in their usual comfortable silence, all while all their classmates that day had avoided sitting next to him in class. 

Shino couldn’t let the topic go, so he spoke up. “What you said to me earlier… thank you.” 

Hinata blushed and averted her gaze. “Yeah,” she said with a shy smile.

They then went back to their silent lunch. Shino was thankful that his high collar hid his mouth because he couldn’t stop himself from smiling.

Shino was a mixture of optimistic and apprehensive when he was assigned to Team 8 with Hinata and Kiba. Hinata was already in his good graces, but he was unsure about Kiba. Kiba never bullied him or seemed afraid of him, but he had always been rude and abrasive in general, and he hung out with the more rowdy boys in class. 

Kiba whistled, impressed. “Put with two nobles. Imagine that.” He then turned to Shino. “You got a reputation. But you’re pretty strong, yeah?”

“Yes,” Shino replied.

"Good." Kiba broke out into a pleased grin. “We’re a pack now. Let’s show the rest of our class that Team 8 is the best out of all of ‘em."

Hinata smiled while twiddling her thumbs. “Yeah.” 

And just like that Shino was immediately accepted into the group. Kurenai had been very nice to him too. Absolutely none of them were afraid of or weirded out by him, which was odd. But nice. Really nice. 

When they took their Team 8 photo, Kurenai squashed them in real close, and Shino was hyper-aware of all the foreign physical touches. One of Kurenai’s gentle hands was on his left shoulder blade, his right shoulder was against Kiba’s left, and his right arm was brushing against Hinata’s back. All at once he could smell Kurenai’s flowery perfume, Kiba and Akamaru’s dog smell, and Hinata’s scented soap. After the photo was taken, Kurenai affectionately patted their heads. It was a weird and different sensation to Shino, but he liked it. It was the first time he had been touched affectionately by someone outside of his clan. 

There were eventually more touches too. Kiba was touchy, Shino learned. Kiba roughly patted his back after they had succeeded combining their jutsus into a tactical move. Shino immediately bristled, but when he realized that the touch was done in camaraderie he relaxed a little. Sometimes when Kiba greeted him he liked to playfully punch his shoulder, just barely enough to hurt, all while greeting him with a toothy grin. The first time it happened Shino was confused and offended, and made it known. While most of their Academy classmates would shrink in fear at having his ire, Kiba did no such thing, and expressed his annoyance at Shino’s ignorance, but then explained it to him. _Ah, another camaraderie thing,_ Shino thought. He had seen boys at the Academy do something similar - roughhousing to show fondness. The next time Shino saw Kiba he punched him in the shoulder. “Ow, not like that!” Kiba complained. Sometimes Kiba also liked to hook an elbow around Shino’s neck and pull him down to his height in a conspiratorial huddle when he had ‘boys only’ comments to share when they were among their team. Shino was always irritated by this - his neck was always wrenched in an awkward angle and he didn’t believe there was anything said that Hinata and Kurenai couldn’t also know, but he did like that Kiba considered him someone to confide in. 

While Kiba’s touches were rough, Hinata’s were all gentle touches. She tugged at his sleeve when she wanted to get his attention, when she couldn’t form the words properly with her voice. She dusted him off of stray grass and dirt that clung to his hair and jacket after training. She was first to pull him to his feet if he was hurt on a mission and check him for injuries. Sometimes they would both kneel next to each other, shoulders pressed together, as they hovered over a bug that caught Hinata’s attention, as Shino rambled out facts about it and pointed out the tiny details in their patterns that warranted getting close for a good look. Sometimes she would ask about the same bugs he’s already explained a hundred things about already, but Shino could always come up with something new to say. No matter how long he droned on for, Hinata would just smile and listen intently, and she never seemed to get bored of it, even when his voice grew hoarse. All of it was more than he ever dared to daydream he would be allowed to have with her. 

Kurenai’s touches were like the touches of a mother he had never known. Guiding, supportive, and nakedly affectionate. Kurenai was the first person outside of the Aburame Clan to hug him. She had pulled him in suddenly after expressing how proud she was at his skill on their mission, and was thankful that he didn’t get seriously hurt after he got separated from the rest of their team. Shino had froze when she hugged him, and his brain had to process what was happening for a few seconds before he realized what she was doing. Shino knew what a hug was of course; he sometimes got them from his father and relatives, but Aburames were generally pretty hands off. And the idea that someone outside of his clan would want to hug him was absolutely foreign to him. The hug was short and sweet, and Kurenai pulled away before Shino remembered he was supposed to do something with his arms to reciprocate. Even though it was brief, it made him feel warm for the rest of the day. 

Even Akamaru had his touches too. He would insistently press his wet nose to Shino’s ankles when he had an interesting smell on him or lick Shino’s fingers when his hand was in reach. He would affectionately lean against Shino’s leg and thwap him with his wagging tail and jump up on Shino’s leg when he wanted to be pet. Shino had pets before in the form of collected bugs, but a dog was a whole new experience in the way they actively wanted to socialize, and how they had no concept of human stigma. Akamaru didn’t care at all that he was a living bug hive like other humans did. 

Shino really liked all the little touches, and treasured each one. He didn’t know the first thing about being casually affectionate, and he just stiffly accepted each moment, but at least it didn’t seem like his team minded much his lack of reciprocation. 

Hinata had been the first non-Aburame he had initiated a hug with. The two of them were alone in the forest collecting new insects for his spring collection. He asked her then why she was never scared of any bugs like the other girls in the Academy had been. With a sad smile, she said they reminded her of herself. Shino asked why. Hinata usually tried to dodge around answering things directly about herself that made her uncomfortable by fumbling her way through to a non-answer. But here she was oddly honest. “B-Because they’re small, weak, unnoticed, a-and misunderstood.” Hinata burst out crying then, like she was letting out years of bottled up feelings. Shino froze and dumbly stared at her for a few long seconds, unsure of what to do. He knew exactly why she felt like this - he didn’t miss the moody looks she tried to hide when the topic of her clan came up. Shino hated seeing her so upset, and wanted to help her feel better somehow. Ignoring the worry that she might cringe away from him in disgust, he hugged her. Unpracticed, his awkward arms had moved mechanically around her, and he wasn’t even sure if he was doing it right. Hinata didn’t seem to care, and gripped him tightly and sobbed into his shoulder until she felt better. 

One of his happiest days was when he was referred to as a friend for the first time. Shino, Kiba, and Akamaru were heading home - their clan compounds were in the same direction, but the Inuzuka one was the closer of the two. It had been cloudy all morning, and suddenly a torrent of rain began to descend on them. Kiba called for Shino to follow him, and they made it to the wonderful dryness of Kiba’s home. Kiba tossed him a towel to dry himself and Shino had bluntly said it was pointless since he’ll just get wet again running home to the Aburame compound. Kiba told him to just stay over until it stopped, and he could just have lunch with his family while they waited. Shino thanked him and Kiba shrugged it off. “No biggie; Mom’ll be thrilled I brought a friend over.” 

Stupefied, Shino had repeated, “Friend?” with utter confusion. Surely Kiba misspoke. The only reason why his teammates were kind to him was out of obligation, surely. Having good rapport was simply a way to be a more effective team. 

Kiba scoffed at him in response like he was stupid and it was all obvious. “Yeah, we’re friends?”

“I see,” Shino said, mystified. “We are.” 

Later that evening they had met up with Hinata when the rain had stopped. Kiba glanced in Shino’s direction and pointed a thumb at Shino. “Hey, Hinata. You consider Shino a friend, right?”

Hinata looked confused for an instant, and Shino held his breath for a moment, awaiting her answer. “Of course I do!” she answered with absolute confidence (a rare sight). She then looked to Shino with sudden worry. “W-We’re friends, right, Shino? I mean… if you don’t… t-that’s fine...” She glanced to her feet then, and started twiddling her thumbs as she mumbled. “I-I mean…” 

Before Hinata could lose herself further in her insecurities, Shino spoke up. “Hinata.” Her head shot up to look at him. “I consider you my friend too.” 

She blushed deeply and smiled. “I’m glad.”

Shino lowered his face into his collar and smiled. He discovered today he had not just one friend, but _two_. His first real friends since Torune. He never thought he could be so lucky. 

After the reveal that his teammates were also his friends, Shino’s interactions with them took on a different light. They wanted to interact with him because they actually _liked_ him. And he knew in return he had to do his damnedest to be considered a worthy friend to them both. He found himself opening up, bit by bit. He chatted with them more over small nothings, and he spoke more than to just make observations or to respond to someone. It was so much easier to do so when he knew he had their friendship. With time, he was even able to form unique friendships with both of his teammates too. 

Kiba would mildly irritate Shino from time to time due to his abrasive, extroverted nature, but it also became part of Kiba’s charm. Shino would play up his annoyance sometimes and the two would have a lighthearted bicker back and forth. For fun, Kiba and him would also argue over ridiculous topics, like whether a tomato was a fruit or a vegetable, or whether a fox was more canine or feline. They would both exaggerate their investment in their argument; Shino would act stubbornly indignant while Kiba would act irritated and exasperated as part of their play. Kiba would sometimes rib on Shino directly, and Shino (feeling a mixture of offense but also with a giddy sense of vengeance) would shoot back a sharp-tongued retort. The friendly-natured headbutting between Kiba and himself seemed something like the roughhousing friendships between boys he saw at recess, and he liked that he too was able to have something like that of his own. 

His friendship with Hinata was a lot different. He didn’t really observe many opposite gender friendships growing up, but he really liked having one, especially with her. While the two of them were rather quiet when in groups, when alone together they were both rather talkative. Hinata spoke more alone in his presence than he had observed her with any other person, and he felt a strong sense of pride over that. They didn’t waste time on the small nothings like the types of casual conversation that happened in the presence of extroverts, who always felt the annoying need to fill every quiet moment with their voice. When Shino and Hinata spoke their conversations took on a deep, introspective nature, and they always let the quiet breathe comfortably between them when nothing needed to be said. 

Sometimes Hinata would talk primarily; talking about small things that made her happy that she thought too insignificant to mention in the presence of a group. When she talked about her feelings and insecurities, it would start at a slow, crawling pace as she briefly hinted at things here and there. Shino made sure to give her his patient silence in order to work up the courage to continue. He was always rewarded for it when she would begin rambling, all of the words and feelings tumbling out of her mouth in a jumbled, confused mess until her voice went hoarse. And then Shino would help her untangle her feelings, never faltering with his unwavering support. (She also gave him much more practice on how to hug people properly.) 

Other times Shino would talk primarily; sometimes he would ramble about a random bug fact he knew that no one else would care to listen to, because he knew that she would always give him her undivided attention. Other times, when Shino was feeling more vulnerable, he was able to talk about his feelings too - about missing Torune, about his insecurities and loneliness in the Academy, and his struggles to connect to others. Hinata never judged, and offered him a soft, comforting support that always soothed his worries. 

Other days when they were alone they wouldn’t speak a single word to each other, just existing in each other’s presence as they did their own separate things. Sometimes Hinata would read while he busied himself with his insects, or the two of them would just sit in silence and bask in the nice breeze or the view of nature from where they sat. The lack of expectation of conversation was nice, and it allowed both introverts to recharge their social batteries together in peace. 

After the war, Kurenai and him sat down for a cup of tea at her apartment. In the middle of the conversation Kurenai giggled at something he said and gave him a warm, nostalgic smile. “You’ve really changed, haven’t you? You’ve grown up into a fine young man.” Confused, Shino asked her what she meant. “When I first met you, you were such a quiet, stoic boy. You’ve become so more expressive and talkative, and it’s nice how close you’ve grown to Kiba and Hinata. Also, I never expected you to develop such a sharp wit.”

“I’m funny?”

“Goodness, yes,” Kurenai giggled again. “Your bone dry delivery… especially when the other people around you are left nervous or confused since they can’t tell if you’re being serious or not.”

“So you’re saying… I made them _bugged_ out.” 

Kurenai laughed. “The puns still need a little work though.”

Shino broke out in a wide smile. Mirai toddled over to him and Shino sweeped her up high, earning him a giggle fit from her. 

One time when Shino and Hinata hung out together, the topic of their shared lunch days in the Academy came up for the first time. Strange how it never came up until now. “I was so thankful that we sat together,” Hinata said. “Every day I felt so nervous coming to the Academy, dreading the days where everyone had to pick partners and I would always be the odd one out. But I felt relieved that you would always be there for me when I needed a partner, or during lunch. I know we didn’t really talk, but… I considered you a friend back then too.” 

Shino smiled. “The feeling was mutual. You were my only friend. I wish I had the courage to speak to you more back then.” 

Hinata leaned affectionately into his shoulder from the park bench they were seated at. “Same. We could have been friends much sooner. But we both didn’t really know how to talk to people back then, did we?”

“We’ve gotten better.” 

“We have,” Hinata giggled. “I’m just glad we were assigned on a team together. It gave us both the push to finally talk to each other, huh?”

“Yes, and I was able to finally become friends with you, and the rest of our team too. It was the best thing that has happened to me.”

Shino thought whether then was the right time to confess his feelings for her, the feelings he had carried for her all these years. He had already been so lucky to have had her as a friend… could someone like him even dare to wish for more? Hinata had only recently admitted to him that she had fallen out of love with Naruto after all… 

“Hey, Shino! Hinata!” Kiba called to them from a distance. Mirai was riding on Akamaru’s back waving and Kurenai was there too waiting for them with her gentle smile. 

No, now was not the right time. They were supposed to hang out with all of Team 8 today after all. Perhaps next time when the two of them could be alone. 

“Let’s go, Hinata,” Shino said, standing up from the bench and offering her his hand. 

She took it with a warm smile. 

**Author's Note:**

> Shino and Hinata's lunch buddy thing was totally influenced by my middle school days. I started out not having many friends - and lunch was the most terrifying part of the day because it felt like everyone's eyes were on you, judging you for having no one to sit with. There was always a 'social reject' table of sorts where you could sit quietly among others who also didn't have friends to sit with. But since everyone who sat there was so painfully shy and anxious, none of us talked or dared to look at each other, even though we used each other as company, and we could have honestly have been friends. 
> 
> The same went for those terrifying days of the teacher saying today we could 'pick our own partners'. There was usually another painfully shy and quiet person I could be paired up with, and when the teacher would announce it was time to partner up, we would look to each other anxiously and nod. Still, neither of us spoke to each other past what we were assigned to do. 
> 
> Even when I never spoke to my lunch or 'pick your partner' companions, I did feel some weird sense of camaraderie and pseudo-friendship with them at my loneliest, and I desperately wished I knew how to be brave enough to talk to them. A small, simple positive interaction with someone, one that no one would think twice about, was significant to me and made my whole day. When I was finally adopted by an extrovert (like Sakura with Ino) who introduced me to their collective friend group, each friendship was incredibly precious to me, and getting used to all the new social interactions made me feel a little bit like an alien.
> 
> That frustrating social incompetence and loneliness of those days reminds me of Shino and Hinata. Since Shino in canon has expressed so much love for his friends, I imagine him to be quite lonely and sensitive in the Academy, despite his stoicism being at its worst back then. Him being different and weird would also affect his ability to make friends, because let's be real - little kids are mean and slightly sociopathic (until they can develop their empathy levels more with maturity). Personality wise I was much more like Hinata - painfully shy and barely able to hold a conversation, and I imagine Hinata's ability to make friends would have suffered greatly as well due to this. I would have loved for Shino and Hinata to have been friends back then, but I imagine both of them being too socially incompetent to start a proper friendship. But I like the idea they were still able to find comfort in each other back then, and eventually become great friends to one another once they picked up a few more social skills. 
> 
> So yeah, I definitely channeled those feelings of middle school into writing Shino, and hopefully it fits him. :)


End file.
